The Way of the Wild
by Ygritte Kissed By Fire
Summary: When Jon Snow defends Ygritte at the Battle of Castle Black he is named a deserter, he is ordered to pay the iron price, but when Ygritte steals him away he has two choices, join the Free Folk and learn to be a wildling, or turn himself over to his brethren. Can Jon learn to be free or will his honor forever bound him to the Seven Kingdoms and The Nights Watch?
1. Protection of Love

**Please note that I do not own any of George R. R. Martin's characters, nor worlds, nor places.**

 **Jon Snow**

The sounds of battle were everywhere, the cries of his brethren, the cries of the wildlings, they mingled together as one and despite the fight with the Thenn, despite almost failing, he could not help but wonder if Ygritte's cry was among them, if Ygritte was dying somewhere in the field… _Would I defend her? Should I find her? Or will I walk away just as I did before?_ The thought caused him to choke up as he leaned against the pillar to regain his strength, wiping the blood from his face. He didn't have much more time to think of the what if's for the sound of an arrow notching in a bow.

He froze, the sound was all too familiar, one he had heard a dozen times before. _Least if I should die tonight, it will be her arrow that pierces my heart, and not a wildlings knife._ He turned slowly, and his heart raced from his chest, _she is as beautiful as I left her._ But her eyes looked exhausted, her body looked in pain and he knew that he had worn her down, his leaving had killed what little belief she had in him. She was not one to grow attached, that he knew, but she had attached herself to him for reasons unknown and he, himself, had grown attached to the fiery wildling. He had let her in his bed and in his heart, and he couldn't seem to shake her.

She stared at him as he smiled, and he watched as the corners of her mouth twitched but she held her gaze. She wouldn't talk, he knew that, for if she did her voice would break as would her focus… her determination. She wanted him dead, but she also wanted him to live, he could see it in her eyes. For all he did not know, these were things he did, and he was certain of them. He wanted to say her name, wanted to speak to her but before he could, a shadow slipped in behind her. His eyes flickered towards it, enough to give warning to Ygritte. Swiftly, she turned on her feet and her arrow flew through the air. The brother she had hit was no more than a child, he knew him by name, Olly, but Ygritte seemed to recognize him slightly as well, but only so much. Her eyes flickered with a realization but she didn't move towards the dying boy, instead she faced Jon, another bow notched.

"You betrayed me" She stated fiercely, her eyes burning like wildfire. He had nothing to say, he couldn't say anything even if he wanted to. She wasn't wrong. He had hurt her, betrayed her, left her in the rain, he had suffered her arrows, sure, but nothing would be as painful as her inner hurts, that he knew.

"I know" he remarked, softly, almost guiltily. Her bow dropped ever so slightly, the way it did when she hesitated the shot or thought it a lost cause. He was no lost cause, so this was nothing more than a hesitation. Still, he prepared himself for death, around him others were dying, yet for reasons unknown the two were being granted a type of peace, not a brother nor a wildling had stumbled upon them yet and so they stood.

"You know nothin', Jon Snow" she remarked, in the same tone she always did and he couldn't help but to smile. She re-notched the bow "Any last words, crow?" she spat, aiming the point of the arrow for his chest. She waited as his mouth parted to answer but as he did a man of the Nightswatch went for her throat. She turned her arrow towards him but she had little chance to release and no room to aim. Jon felt himself lunge forward in a sense of protectiveness, his hands shoving his brother to the side. He stumbled, faltered and stared in utter shock at Jon.

"You betrayin' us now? You worthless shit, protecting a wildling girl." he scolded, eyes burning with hatred "I knew you were no good, this her, the red-head yah fucked?" he taunted. At his side, Ygritte fumbled for the breath his brother had knocked from her, and too late she head readied her bow. The brother in black had disappeared with distaste, surely off to tell Allister of his betrayal They will name me a deserter for sure. I will be called a craven and a wildling lover just as they all assumed I was to begin with. This time I will have no defense for he saw it with his own eyes.  
He stared for an awful long time, to long for his own good, hearing nothing around him.

"Ygritte" he stated, turning towards the place where she had been, but she was gone now, there was nothing left of the red head except and arrow she had dropped. _She never leaves her arrows behind._ He noted, his eyes searching the area desperately for the fire kissed girl he loved so dearly, but the only thing he found were slight scuff marks in the ground. Panic settled in his gut _I have made the gravest of decisions… the worst of mistakes. To leave her… I have brought her death and even in my protection I have summoned her destruction. They have seen me defend her. They will know and when the battle is done I will die for it. I am sure._ He had done nothing more than protect the girl he loved, he would kill any of the wildlings, save for Tormund and Ygritte, but he had never thought out of the hundreds and thousands that he should come across either

Now he was soon to lose one if not both of the Free Folk he had grown close to but worse was that it was Ygritte who had been dragged away, he knew it for certain. Ygritte was not one to drag away her victims, she killed quickly and easily unless she needed a hostage, but even then, to drag the person was not in her style. She would hold a knife to their throat and force them forwards her even an arrow pressed against their spines but she would never drag them.

He searched desperately for her, avoiding fights with others by sticking to the shadows, though occasionally he had to pull Longclaw from its sheath and defend himself, or put the sword through a man's belly, but his main goal was Ygritte, he barely noticed the men that fell at his feet. He wanted to call for her but that would draw attention to the issue, to him, and he could not hope for even a chance to right the situation should they find him searching for the wildling girl he had taken to bed _The woman I love,_ He thought more firmly on the matter. He would not let her just be the girl he had bedded, for she was so much more than that. She was his heart and soul. Even as he sat at Castle Black, even as he betrayed the secrets of the Free Folk he had only thought of her, worried over her, wished to die for her.

Honor truly meant nothing when it was set up against the love of a woman, for that was a battle lost every time. Jon had learned that the hard way _Or perhaps, the best way I could have_. He pushed forward, only pausing when he caught sight of Ygritte, held firmly in hands of two brothers, She squirmed drastically, hatefully. "Let me go, you stupid crows!" she shouted, along with other obscenities. She was angry and rightfully so. Jon, himself, felt a fire burning in his blood. The two held daggers to her, one to her neck and the other to her stomach. When the dagger touched her stomach, Ygritte froze, her face flushed and her eyes seemed to swell with tears that would never be shed. Jon thought little of it, aside from being furious at the pain in her eyes.

"Let her go" he scolded, as the middle man turned to him.

"And why would I do that? She is nothin' more than a wildling" he laughed, and the two at his side followed. "I'm wonderin' if her hair is as red down their as it is atop her head" he teased, Ygritte spit at the boy in utter disgust but she dare not move.

"Touch me 'n I'll kill ya" she growled, her hands curling into fists. The boys brushed her off. Jon stepped forward, hate in his eyes but he acted intrigued. _They do not know her for the girl I bedded, they only know her for the prospect of a girl they can lay with._ This was good, he could play the part well enough, but he had never been one to disrespect women as such. Ned had always taught him better, but here they were, holding his love, and all he could do was pretend he was interested in raping her.

"I heard you like yourself wildling girls, Jon. May be that you'd like a taste of her yourself. Well, I could let you go first, surely, so long as you don't tell anyone else of it" the other brothers nodded in unison with the leaders words and Jon shrugged, a sting in his heart as he looked at the face of shock that had plastered itself upon Ygritte.

"Sounds fair to me, but I can hold my own, don't need you two holding her up like that" he remarked, nodding to the two brothers. They loosened their grip only slightly,

"She is a fiesty one, this one is. Be careful, don't want t' lose our prize" he stated with sincerity. He took Ygritte's arms tightly in his hands and shoved her backwards towards the tree. He assessed her, she had her bow and arrow still tucked firmly against her back, a good sign for at least she had her weapon.

"Can you get it off without moving much?" he asked, nodding towards her bow. She looked confused but at last she understood, recognition sparking in her eyes.

"Aye, I can" she stated with a nod, her eyes blinking up at him.

"Good, I need you to take out the two at the side, they have but daggers in their hands, the middle shall be for me" he stated, and she nodded silently. Her hand knocked the end of the bow, tilting the string up and over her head. She caught it with utter silence as his one hand reached for Longclaw. "Go" he urged and with that he released her and turned back to the brothers. An arrow caught one in the chest before he even had a chance to say a thing. The other two rushed at them, a sword in the leaders hands and daggers in the last mans hand. Jon pulled Longclaw from the sheath and aimed a deadly hit for the middle man. He dodged, leaving Longclaw to slam against a rock and bounce back to Jon. Jon felt his arms shake as he turned back towards the other, exchanging swings until his face twisted in pain and his body teetered frontwards and back. Jon shoved the sword through his gut, watching as the blood spilled from his stomach. Ygritte knelt behind them an arrow drawn, another firmly implanted in his brethren's back.

Longclaw slid from the man's gut with a sickening sound as he fell to the ground, eyes wide and staring, seeing nothing. Jon looked to Ygritte, her bow held loosely yet still drawn. "Why'd you help me?" she asked, her eyes betraying her skepticism.

"The same reason I always have." he remarked, but she scowled at his words.

"Always? Oh ya' mean the way ya' left me in the rain? The way ya' turned your back on me in the night?" she shot back, and Jon felt a cold since of sorrow enter his chest. She will hate me, she will always hate me. "Why don't ya' run back t' your crows, boy. Since ya' fancy bein' cold at night without a woman to warm your bed. Since you fancy leavin' the ones you claim t' love for some brothers who care less 'bout you than you seem t' know." she started, her eyes narrowing.

"Ygritte, I have always needed you. I fancy you, nothing and no one else." he reminded her stepping closer. She raised her arrow and aimed it for his heart, her preferred place for his death it seemed. Made sense. He had torn hers from her chest now she longed to do the same to him.

"Ya' need me? That right? So why'd ya' leave then? You promised me, Jon Snow. You promised me t' me face that you'd ne'er betray me, yet you left. I would'a gone with you. I would'a left." she pleaded, although her voice sounded as strong as ever. Jon felt his chest tighten.

"I could never let you leave your people for me, Ygritte, you know that" he stated softly, warmly. Her hand quivered as did her lip but she held her ground.

"Aye, but you left your people for me and me folk." she stated "I told you, you were mine as I was yours. That means we fight for each other no one else, but ya' lef' me in th' rain for your crows" She complained, her voice deep, filled with hurt and hate. She made a sound then, a pitiful sound, one even he could tell she hated herself for, but she did not let a tear fall. Not even for a moment.

"I had no choice, Ygritte, you know that. They wanted to kill me, they would have killed you for protecting me" he wanted her to understand, he wanted her to see it the way he did but she didn't. She glared on still, but her bow had fallen lower and an arrow no longer aimed itself at his heart.

"You don't know that. Tormund would'a ne'er 'urt me an' you know that" she stated viciously.

"No, Ygritte. I don't know that, Orell already tried to kill you once, and if Tormund hadn't done it than Orell would have. You were in danger, I had to make it seem as though it was not your choice… like you would never betray your people… because you won't" he stated softly, his eyes dropped to the ground "As I could not betray mine own…"

"Aye, but ya' jus' did, Jon Snow" she remarked, waving her arms at the dead around her. Jon nodded in awknowledge meant.

"Yes, I know… and I will pay the price dearly." he remarked.


	2. Your Honor is No Honor

**(Ygritte)**

There was silence in each of them as the reality of his words set in. Ygritte's bow slumped, arrow no longer notched, but held firmly in place, aimed at the ground. The sound of battle seemed to fade, the cries of her Free Folk, of his crows all a distant sound now, now that fear had crept through her spine. She wanted to approach him but she needed the distance. She had never let herself feel lost for someone else but now, amidst the reality, she was lost for Jon.

"They will kill you, is tha' what you're sayin'?" she asked, though she already knew the answer well enough. She had read it on his face, in the way his body had seemed to slump in defeat. The man she held in her heart now looked ten times the wearier since the last she had seen of him, before this damned battle.

"Aye, that is the truth of it. I have dishonored myself." he stated, dropping his eyes only slightly. Anger and irritation flared in her bloodstream as she watched.

"Tis all 'bout honor with you crows, but what is honor in leavin' your woman? Tha's no honor, if ya' ask me." she scolded, narrowing her eyes, but she couldn't hold the anger for long. She sighed heavily "and wha' will you do now, Jon Snow?" she asked, her voice filled with concern. Jon looked lost for words, and at that moment she wished she knew what was going in in his head.

"I will right things, the best I can" he remarked, blinking slowly. She knew he wanted her to understand but she did not, and she never would, his loyalty to everything but her irked her badly and she couldn't find the reasons behind it.

"So you're gonna go off't your crows then? You're like a bird with your wings clipped. Stuck in a cage all the day long" she scolded, standing and dropping her arrow to the side. "Leave then, I won't stop ya' and i won't shoot ya" she stated, he seemed relieved if only slightly for that small fact, yet a small shimmer of disappointment lingered in his eyes _would 'e rather me shoot 'im than 'is brothers hang him?_ The thought dissipated after a second as he smiled weakly.

"I know you'd never hurt me, I told you that before didn't it?" he offered, smiling slightly. She returned it, if only half-heartedly.

"You know nothing, Jon Snow" she retorted as she always did but as he walked away her heart clenched within the confines of her chest. She was lost for words, for actions… she was lost. Jon would die at the hands of his brothers, even he knew that, she had seen it in his eyes, and he would let them for his honor. She cursed the damned crow that had caused her heart and her wildness to steal away from her. She had left it in that cave… the cave Jon Snow had left his honor, or so she had thought.

She turned away from the place he had disappeared to, but she couldn't help but glance over her shoulder once more, her red hair falling across her face ever so slightly, ' _e is brave. Stupid… but brave._ With that she turned away for the last time that night and disappeared back to the Free Folk who awaited her.

She hadn't slept peacefully, in fact she had hardly slept at all, morning had rolled around before she knew it and afternoon followed and there was not a thing on her mind but Jon Snow and his well being. _If they 'aven't killed 'im they are sure t' do it t'day_ and she wasn't wrong, they would kill her folk first before they killed Jon and many had been left behind but for her luck she had returned to camp to be embraced by the thick arms of Tormund. She had smiled broadly but it had been a dull smile and even he knew.

"Killed your crow, did you?" he had asked so nonchalant like but she had shook her head. Perhaps she had, indirectly of course, but if he were to die she had wanted it to be at her arrows, not by his brothers.

"Wish it 'ad been me who ended 'is life but it will be 'is brothers" Tormund looked shocked by her words, for crows were not like to kill crows.

"And why is that?" he asked, following her as she slipped into her tent, avoiding the conversation altogether but Tormund was not like to let that happen. He slipped in after her, scratching at his bear as though he had fleas, it was too cold for such nonsense though, even she knew that.

"Aye, because 'e is saved me" she remarked shrugging as if she cared little but her heart ripped itself apart. She should never have let him walk away, never have let him leave her but she also knew that when she had tried to keep his heart, she had failed. She sat herself down atop a mass of furs and skins, the same ones they had slept between together once, the memories were bittersweet, bringing the slightest show of tears to her eyes.

"You want t' go after 'im don't you?" Tormund asked, he stared at her firmly, watching as she pulled her legs to her stomach and coddled them there at her breasts. She did want to, when would she not want to, but the question that was more pressing was, could she? Without getting herself killed? She tightened her legs to her chest further, as if to protect herself from the harshness, but before she could so much as breathe in to calm her nerves, shouts echoed through the camp. In confusion, she stumbled to her feet, tripping over Tormund in the process but never letting herself fall.

The noise seemed to be coming from the center of camp, high shouts and whistles, as well as japes meant to taunt someone, but these were no japes for a man but a beast. At the center of the commotion was a large white beast, one all to familiar in stature to Ygritte. With disgust for her fellow Free Folk, she shoved through them with unkind words until she could fully see the creature.

"Stop it! Stop it now!" She shouted. Though many grumbled at her harshness everyone stepped back a tad "'tis just a wolf" she heard someone shout, and many other joined in to plead their cause but Ygritte ignored them. Bright red eyes turned to her, teeth that shown so brilliant in the sunlight again fell hidden beneath the lips of the wolf. Recognition sparked in his eyes.

"Aye, it is you." she stated softly, a smile forming on her lips. The pale wolf took a step forward while Ygritte grasped for the words Jon had spoken so many times. At last they came to her and her eyes brightened "Ghost, it's Ygritte… t' me boy" her words faltered only slightly but Ghost listened all the same. He approached her side and pushed his muzzle into her hand. She knew then that she had to find a way to save Jon, whether or not she hated him for such as he did to her.

 **Jon**

Jon sat hunched over in the corner of his cell, his black hair falling before his face to cover the eyes that wept for what he had lost. He cared little for the loss of the Night's Watch, but Ygritte was a loss almost incomprehensible _Least she is alive with her Folk…_ He thought, finding solace in that small bit of truth. Worry stumbled through his mind, however, for how long? Will she be killed in the next battle? Or the next? He knew he could not do much to stop it at this point but oh how he wished he could. _I love her more than I could have ever thought. I betrayed the people I felt most at home with only to be killed when I return to my true home._

Jon had felt a sort of kinship with the wildlings, he had felt a part of something. On his side of the wall he had always fought for recognition and seldom got any, but with them, despite their mistrust, he had been a part. They all noticed him as the man who killed the Halfhand and because of that they all respected him to some degree. He fondly remembered Tormund's rough voice, the deep laugh you could feel in your gut…he longed to be accepted as Mance had accepted him and more than anything the past few weeks… he had longed for Ygritte's warmth next to him, her head on his chest, red hair tickling his beard as it had so many nights prior.

Now he would die alone, without even a kiss farewell from the girl he longed for most sullenly, but even he knew he could not betray his people… at least he hadn't been able to. Sure he had brought her to bed, let her worm her way into his heart but hadn't he returned… he paused on the thought. He remembered once… he had told himself that if he were to kill a brother he belonged to the far North… the wall would have none of him and he would no longer belong to his people… hadn't he just gone through with that?

At this point he was no longer sure how many hours had passed or how long he had been curled against the railings. He had seen many a wildling escorted from the cells only to not return that night. He knew they had been hanged… questioned first… and then hanged and all of it was his fault. Several had recognized him and several he himself had recognized, they had called him a traitor, and that he was… both to his brothers and to his free folk. One wildling however, but the name of Sharpstone, had only had kind words for him.

"I saw you protectin' 'er. She was goin' to kill you but you protected 'er any'ow. You may 'ave betrayed us but at least you kept your woman safe, can't say I don't respect that none." he had offered, with a smile. Humbled by death he was sure but each wildling approached their fate with a bravery he could not offerup for any of his comrades. Not a one begged for mercy, not a one knelt to the ground and pleaded. "We don't kneel to anyone beyond the wall" Mance had told him, and they did not kneel, even here when they were to die. He admired the bravery they carried in their hearts, _Will I die such a brave death? Perhaps Ygritte is right, my honor is no honor compared to their bravery._

As night fell over Westeros once again, Jon came to the conclusion that his life had been spared for another night, whether he was thankful or not was another story. However, this night was different, where at first there was silence, there were now sounds of shouts, cries and screams. _Are they attacking us again? I'll die for sure if they find me here… Ygritte knows…_ his mind went blank and a sort of dread filled his chest. He leaned his head back against the wall, sighing heavily.

"THE GATES ARE OPENING!" he heard the shouts from several different voices, on being Allister's, but the words were not a command… the wildlings were opening the gate… Suddenly another sound, a familiar sound echoed in his ears. The sound was one he had heard constantly, an almost silent snarling, and the fear sound of man running from a beast. The chaos continued, but this wasn't an attack… not as it was before for their was no sound of giants, and not many wildling voices could be heard, but amongst the racket he heard one single one. One that made his heart stop beating if only for a second.

"Where is 'e? Tell me or I'll gut ya', do you 'ear me?" her voice was sharp and tough, answered only by whimpers of a crow boy. He heard footsteps headed his way, and then a familiar image appeared before him. There was no sound in the hall accept the whimper of the guardsman and jangle of keys. He turned his head towards them as the guardsman opened the door to the cell that held Jon within its confines. A slick as a snake, she reached her hand out and slit his throat. He had begged for mercy prior, he was sure, but Ygritte was not the type to listen to kneelers (as she liked to call them) and he knew as much.

"Ygritte…" he started, waiting for the cold dagger now warmed with blood to open his own veins and spill out his own life to her but instead she just smiled half-heartedly and reached out a hand to help him up.

"Come along, Jon Snow. We must go now" she stated and with that he reach up and took her hand.


	3. Conversations in the Night

**Ygritte**

Several days had passed since she had rescued Jon Snow, and all seemed rather right with the world. She had refused to bed him but he seemed no worse for wear and didn't push the matter on her. He even turned from her when she had wormed her way from his arms, not yet trusting the touch of him. He had left her once and fear made her weary but where she held fear she showed anger. She had chosen to save him yet she couldn't bear to look at him half the time. All she had wanted to do was kill him but she couldn't even manage that well enough. Ghost had made to laying between the two, and though Ygritte was displeased by it, Jon seemed content to curl against his wolf.

"'You know, 'e smells better than you" she had teased, hoping to call up his defiance as so often she did but instead he shrugged and laughed, something that threw her off completely. Jon Snow was much to much a solemn man, he barely smiled and when he did it was for her and her alone, such as was the one he had born the night of the battle, but a laugh was a different thing.

"I can't say you are wrong" he teased in response "Though that is a little unfair seeing as he can roll in the snow anytime he'd like" he offered and even Ygritte couldn't help but return the smile.

"Aye, but so could you if you were brave enough" she retorted. The snow had fallen once in the last few days, it had left a small layer of the white ice along the ground but not much, but it gave Ygritte a sense of the true North she hadn't felt for some time, but there was something more swirling around in her mind and heart, something that drew her more to Jon than she liked in her displeased state. She loved him, sure, and she wanted him with her always but he had to learn of her hurt and they we he had betrayed her.

"A man never betrays his woman, Ygritte" words her mother had once said to her and though her face was blurred, she remembered her voice with such clarity. "When a man steals you he is meant to keep you, you'd be wise to remember that." Ygritte wiped the tears that weren't their from her eyes, turning her head back up to Jon.

"You alright? Thought I lost you for a moment" he stated in earnest, reaching out to touch her hand ever so gently. She yanked it away quickly, but kept her eyes down, vulnerable and hating herself for it. "Ygritte…" his voice was so filled with worry that a sort of fury filled her.

"Like you care!" she spit, immediately regretting it as he flinched away.

"Why did you save me if you don't even want me around?" he asked, looking hurt. He would have rather died at the moment, she was certain of it, and she was glad for it. She had wanted nothing in her life but to make him suffer for her pain, for her hurt, but she would never let him die unless it was at her hands, even he should have known that. Ygritte wrapped her arms around her stomach nervously, but she never portrayed it in her face.

"Like I would let some stupid crow hang you? Stupid." she uttered, glaring at him but her shoulders slumped and her stomach turned in agony. She cringed ever so slightly but made no sound, she didn't even try to fight him as he moved towards her and rested a hand on his shoulder.

"Ygritte, what's wrong?" He asked, gently but lovingly. She shook her head, nothing was wrong, she was just feeling ill. Perhaps a bad piece of food or something in the weather she was certain it would go away soon but the pain had been there for weeks, and she had been nauseous and tired more oft than not.

"Nothin' just need some sleep is all, I'll be fine" she remarked, turning away from Jon and moving off towards the tent, but she paused. With everything that had happened and was happening, she wanted nothing more than to lie with him. She turned towards him and sighed "Are you comin'? Or you gonna leave me by meself?" she scolded, refusing to outright ask him. Jon looked awfully confused but he stood and followed after him. As she found her way beneath her sheets of skin and fur, he joined her. She turned her back to him but pushed herself tightly to his frame. His arm found its way around her waist and pulled her even tighter against him, his face burying itself into her fur.

Night was near approaching and a calm had settled over camp. There was the sound of laughter outside along with the smell of smoke and food but the only thing Ygritte noticed was the tantalizing scent of Jon at her side. She twisted herself around to face him, his eyes shut gently, off in some dream she could not see. She reached down ever so slightly to find him beneath the skins and with a slightly sigh he parted his eyes.

"What are you doing?" he asked cautiously, his eyes brimming with some feeling she could not place. She smiled almost shyly, something rare for her. She had missed him, more than she could confess, especially with her actions earlier that morning and the whole week prior, but perhaps… she could show him? She pushed herself up to straddle him and let him find his way inside her. He complained none, his lips and body acting fervently to her whims. He wasted not time in finding her hair to hold, her mouth to kiss and her breast to cradle in his hand. The laughter had paused at the sounds of the two but no one said a thing. She heard a laugh, most like from Tormund but she could care less.

When they were done she found herself curled against him as he stroked her hair "I missed you, you know" he stated softly "I missed the smell off you, the feel of you… I missed your voice and your bravery. I missed your wildness and this red hair of yours. I missed your sounds and your movements. I missed everything about you." he murmured against her head, kissing her gently. She smiled, out of sight, and turned her head up to him.

"Aye, I bet you did, if you missed me all so much, perhaps you shouldn't o' run off?" she teased, biting at his neck. He groaned, a sound so sweet to her but made no moves towards her. She turned onto her stomach to watch him, his eyes brimming with emotions, the first she had seen in some time. Before he had a chance to say a thing she changed the subject. "Was Castle Black a true castle? A castle for lords?" she asked briefly, remembering the windmill they had seen, the one she had believed to be a castle. Castle Black was taller than the other, but crumbling in places, she could not understand why any lordly type would wish to live there.

"Aye it was a true castle, but not for the likes of lords and their families. Castle Black is meant for the Night's Watch alone.." he stated, running a hand through her hair. She narrowed her eyes in confusion, one Jon seemed to pick up. "The Castle I lived in, in Winterfell, the was a Castle made for Lords and their families. It has defenses… but it also has living quarters… it has a Great Hall… and a place to feast and bedrooms four times the size of Mance's tent" he paused "There is a garden in Winterfell…" he stated and she saw his thoughts slide away from her, but she placed a gentle kiss upon his lips and he seemed to wake from his thoughts with a start.

"Did you want t' marry a lady? Is that why you left me?" she asked. She was not one to believe in such foolish things as marriage but she knew his people were. It was a question that had torn her apart from the moment he had disappeared from her view. The rain had washed the tears she had shed that night, good thing to for she wanted not a soul to know of her hurts. None be he who lay beside her now.

"I never wanted to marry a lady, I had thought about it, sure but in the end I had chosen the Night's Watch…" he stopped briefly, gazing over her body and the face. She felt a tingle run up her spine as a smile danced across his face, ever so lightly, every so subtly. "I love you because you are wild, not at all like the ladies I've met. I wouldn't wish for you to be a lady in court… my sister was much like you. I think you two would get along great" he murmured, but his voice seemed sad, distant almost.

"Aye, I am sure we would 'ave." she responded, her voice earnest. She moved closer to him, the warmth of his body a welcome feel. She had missed it dearly in the time they were separate and though she wanted to hate him she couldn't. She wanted to ask him more of his family, but he seemed to sullen in the way he looked that she couldn't manage to draw out the feelings in him.

"What about you? Did you have any siblings?" he asked, curious of her answer. She hadn't, not that she remembered, though there wasn't much of her mother she remembered, a few phrases here and there and the lovely red of her hair but she could not recall her face, nor her scent… not the way she walked or moved, nothing. A few faded memories were all she had left, so even her answer she was unsure of.

"Not that I remember, no. I was just a girl when Tormund found me all by meself. Well, 'e had found me in the middle of the forest, I was searching for good I was, and 'e offered to 'elp me. I cursed 'im of course, I don't need a mans 'elp none but 'e followed me about any'ow and 'e ended up takin' me back with 'im." she offered, giving some insight into her own past. She remembered that day plain enough. A big burly man Tormund was, with his unwashed beard and thick accent. She had been only six years old at the time, her mother had died long before, some sickness everyone had refused to talk with her about, and she had left to find food. She would never admit it to anyone, not even Tormund that she had been lost that day. The first time she had ever wandered so far and it was that day that she had vowed never to be lost again. She had learned tracking quickly enough, as she had learned hunting and fighting. She was wild from her first steps so it was never hard for her to pick up on.

"That's why you are so close to him, you seemed as such" he offered with a small smile. Her heart warmed a bit as she playfully knocked him upside the head.

"Aye but we never talk o' it. I don't need anyone and that's the truth o' it." she chuckled, but the truth was not such. She had needed Tormund that day, she had needed him desperately as she now needed Jon. In truth she hated it and she would never admit that she needed either as she did but in her heart the truth was plain to see. Jon tossed her a smirk and ran a hand gently through her hair then, feeding on her secret needs.

"Aye, that is certainly the truth of it" he offered, and a smile made its way across her own face. Hunger stirred in her belly and at last she sat up, naked as her name day. Jon's eyes seemed to wander across her body, eyeing every inch of her, She couldn't help the warmth that spread through her in such a way. She smiled as she pulled her skins over her head and covered all her bits.

"Come along now, it's 'bout time we ate a proper meal" she teased, pulling him to his feet and heading for the fires.

 **Authors Note: Thank you for all the comments so far, I hope you all enjoy this chapter. Please feel free to leave me comments or suggestions for what you would like to see in this story, I will try to make some things happen but I can not promise all as this is meant to be the first story in a set of two and I have to follow some sort of outline for this but I don't mind adding things everyone wants to see. The next chapter will reveal quite a bit for Ygritte, stemming more from the beginning of this chapter, but Jon will still know nothing essentially.**


	4. The Truth of the Matter

**Ygritte**

Another few morning had come and gone, another morning in which Ygritte had slunk away from the fires with a sickness in her belly. She was beginning to believe that this was no sickness at all. In her furs not much had changed and even naked her body looked much the same but she was beginning to notice the change in her abdomen, the way it protruded just a bit. She had tried to think back to the time before the battle, the last place they had lay beneath the same skins, but she couldn't recall just how long it had been, a month maybe? She recalled that she had missed her moons blood but she had thought very little of it, she was always so _careful_ always so _sure_ of herself and what she was doing.

It was her fault truly, once they had made it south of the wall there was no moon tea to take and she knew the lands little here, she could not find the herbs to make such a potion. She had lain with him south of the wall, she had let him inside her and had done nothing to keep her womb from allowing him place there. She knew he had not noticed, he was naive to such things, he could stare at her day and night but unless she was round as boulder he would never notice. She had spent this particular morning hunched over a rock, her hand on her belly, her eyes blazing with fury.

 _This cannot be 'appening, it's just an illness, I'll be fine soon, I am sure o' it._ She tried to convince herself that there was nothing growing within her womb, that the sickness had brought on the strange look of her abdomen, that it had cause the retching, the sensitivity to smell not a babe she had no desire for. But was that eventrue? Surely she desired it much. She desired Jon, did she not? So where was it that she could say she did not desire his babe? Jon had been certain to tell her kind he would not sire a bastard. He had told Tormund straight out, but now here she was… would Jon accept it if it were the truth, ' _e would not deny me…_ she tried to say, but her brain retorted her words quickly enough _aye, but 'e already 'as once before._ She bit the inside of her cheek, barely aware of the sounds coming towards her until their voices met her ears.

"Ygritte, Ygritte are you alright?" the voice was soft and gentle, full of concern she could not bear to hear from him. Jon looked down at her with worry filled eyes, Tormund at his side. She turned to the two with a great fire blazing in her blue iris's.

"Aye, I'm fine, you can leave me be." she offered, her voice rough and commanding. Jon never stopped staring at her with his utter concern however, he watched her closely, his eyes flickering to the fluids on the ground. She hadn't held in a meal for three days now, not until dinner. Every morning she would retch, disappearing into the forest, but Jon did not know that this was the reason behind her leavings.

"You've been sick… how long has this been happening?" he asked wearily, eyeing her, readying himself for her sharp retort. She almost felt sorry, _almost._

"None o' your damned business. I'm fine, I can take care of meself you know." she snapped, huffing in indignation. Jon looked not the least bit convinced.

"You've been sneaking off t' the forest a lot lately" Tormund noted, raising an eyebrow at her. She shivered ever so slightly, knowing she was foolish to think Tormund would not have noticed.

"Just been a bit sick is all, don't need t' worry no one else, I'll be fine if you'd just leave me be" she remarked and to her surpriseit worked. Tormund patted Jon on the back in earnest and tossed his head towards the camp.

"Might be she cuts our cocks off if we don't leave 'er be, best get ourselves back, we 'ave a battle to prepare for, and you're no crow now, boy" he remarked. She caught Jon cringe at the prospect of fighting his own and this time she wavered with her response. Instead of commenting as she would have, she smiled at him briefly before turning back towards the forest. She heard the two walk off and relief filled her mind. She could breath now.

She turned her head back towards the forest, her eyes searching for something she wasn't sure. There would be a battle tonight, but whether she would be part of it or not was another question in and of itself. Were she to put herself in the battle she would risk the babe growing in her but if she did not she would raise suspicions, Ygritte was never one to miss a battle. Would that she could, just this once, but she knew better.

 _I should tell 'im, I should. 'e deserves to know, I am certain. But will 'e stay? 'e 'as said before, 'e did not want to bring a bastard into the world, is it the same now? Will 'e stay?_ She could only hope he would, she could only hope he wanted her the way she wanted him and gods did she want him. Every part of him, always. She craved his touch, his kiss, his voice, his person. She craved it all. She had never craved so deeply, never wanted so truly. _I would kill t' keep 'im, I would. I 'ope 'e knows such… would 'e do the same?_

The sun was high in the sky before she made her way back to the group, warmth had settled itself beneath her furs. Jon was the first to see her, he shot to his feet with ease and made his way to her with a quickness she knew not of him. "Ygritte, are you alright?" he asked, she had no chance to say anything before his lips were upon hers. She kissed him back with eagerness before pulling herself away.

"Aye, I'm alright" she stated with a gentleness only he saw. He smiled calmly "You lot gettin' ready for the battle?" she asked, trying to pull herself away from the center of attention. She didn't like the way the Free Folk turned to her with the same curiosity. She wanted their focus to return elsewhere. She was not disappointed. The rest of the Free Folk turned back to their conversations, talking in quick hushed whispers about plans of defeat, but Jon Snow dropped his eyes to the floor whilst Tormund went back to sharpening a few daggers for. Jon turned towards the ten and disappeared behind the skins. "'e been that way all day?" she asked, Tormund turned towards the tent and nodded.

"Not showin' much interest in them, can't say I blame 'im but 'e is comin' tonight. Never proved 'is loyalty before, best he prove it now" he remarked, shrugging it off. Ygritte crinkled her nose slightly, turning away from Tormund. She wished Jon could just go through with it, she wished he could be a Free Folk like her, she just knew he would do better that way, she knew it. She had seen it in him the first time she saw him. He was new to the watch, she was certain, he held that since of pride only the young ones had and he was her age. He had stolen her, the way the Free Folk wished to be stolen though he had no knowledge of such.

"You never killed a woman before did ya'? You know you don't need t' do it. Mance will take you, I know 'e would. There are secret ways, the crows would ne'er catch u-" she had been cut off by the point of his sword.

"I'm as much a crow as they are" he had responded but it wasn't true _it wasn't, 'e is no crow, 'e only wishes t' keep 'is honor. That's all 'e wants, 'e'll honor me now… won't 'e?_ She sighed heavily at the memory and followed closely after Jon Snow. She would make him a Free Folk yet. She would.

 **Author's note: I haven't done any spell check on any of these, I write when I have the idea in my head and post it as I have much going on in my life so I apologize for any grammar mistakes and the like. I am trying to keep this updated regularly, hope you all like it, feel free to leave a review if you would like and if you enjoyed it! Thank you everyone!**


	5. Back to the North (Jon)

**Jon Snow**

The smell of blood hung heavily in the air, but it had not been the Night's Watch that had fallen, it had been the Free Folk, as Jon had known it would be. Ygritte had barely spoken all night as they began their retreat. They would travel back the way they had come, back across the wall, back to the North. It had not been the Night's Watch that had defeated them though, not in truth, it had been Stannis. He had shown up on a lovely bay courser, holding his banner high. He had dismantled the wildling army solely because he had attacked from the rear, surprised them on the battle feild.

It had been a crippling defeat for the wildlings, and especially for Ygritte. As they walked, she looked almost forlorn at the surrounding hillsides, the windmills and the houses. She had only just grown to like them and already they had fallen from her grasp. Despite himself Jon couldn't help but smile when she would pause and stare particularly long at a single house. It was nothing truly. The walls were made of brick but half of them were crumbling, the roof was of straw and caving in on one side. It was not suitable for living. Whether it had been or not before the wildlings had taken the north by storm he could not say but now it was not at all impressive, but she thought it was.

"Why'd they leave?" she had asked, sullenly, staring off at the crumbling house. Jon had shrugged slightly, moving in to take her side.

"I don't know, might be that the house began falling down upon their heads in the night. Might be your kind chased 'em of" he offered. She seem displeased at the latter of the two, crinkling her nose and narrowing her eyes but she didn't retort.

"I would've fought for it" she stated firmly, and Jon had no cause to argue. She would have, that he knew. She was as fierce a fighter as even the kingslayer was like to be, but he couldn't find the reasons in himself to fight for the crumbling thing. Nor a reason he wouldn't want to stay were he to be raided constantly. _I forget just how wild she is, might be she will never be even a sliver of domestic… is that why I love her so much?_ He was certain it was. She was not a lady, no, but she was a fire that spread through his veins quicker than poison. She was his, and he was hers. She had told him that, he remembered, many a time. Every time he had heard it guilt had taken his body and mind, made him feel less than he was, he knew he would betray her and those words had made it all the harder to do, but now as he remembered the words in his heart, he couldn't feel that guilt.

"As I" he stated, though he was no longer thinking of the house in its failed state, no, he was thinking of her, of her heart and her love. Something he no longer deserved but still had, something she had offered to him so willingly. He would fight for it, until he could no longer breathe. He would fight until his blood stopped pumping through his body. He would fight for her _because that is what my father would have done for Catelyn._

Ygritte seemed to sense that his words meant more, for she turned to him with a questioning gaze, one he was not at all prepared for. "Would ya' now?" she asked, with a small smile twisting the ends of her mouth. He rolled his eyes and shoved her forward before walking past her with a grin on his face.

"Come on now, before we get left behind" Ygritte bounced to his side like a puppy, but her eyes were everywhere again. The playfulness of the moment they had shared seemed to loosen her up a bit. She was no longer clinging to her bow as she had been, and her eyes had a slight glimmer but she still remained rather untalkative. They had passed two more villages before he heard her speak, and by then, night had fallen over all of Westeros and the North beyond the wall. They had made their tents and eaten supper with the rest of the group and still she had stayed quiet, but as they slid beneath their skins, she had moved in close, until her head rested on his chest.

"You'll stay with me in the North, won't you?" her voice was shy, or as shy as Ygritte ever got, but it held back a tone Jon couldn't quite place. Jon knew she was worried, with reason. He had left before but he had to carry out his last command… there was no choice then, but now… now he was a deserter, he would pay the iron price should he be found, in truth he had nowhere else to go… but in truth he had nowhere else he wanted to be.

"Yes. I'll stay with you" he whispered softly, leaning forward just enough to kiss the top of her forehead. She sighed, a small, soft sight, a noise he had so longed to hear all day. She didn't say anything, least not with words. She straddled him, her mouth finding his and he no longer cared about the world around him, about what had happened at Castle Black. He cared not of the failed battle, of his brothers, of being called a deserter. He cared only for her, the touch of her, the heat of her… all he wanted was her. It was a quick change, one he had no control over, his body reacted to hers as it had that first night and before long he found himself inside her as he had so many times before. The one thought that did flicker into his mind was the cave they had shared together. The first time he had truly seen Ygritte. She had stood before him, naked as her name day, and he had told her of all the things he loved about her. He had never truly said I love you, simply that he loved things about her. He had told her only after his betrayal… only after he had left her with tears in her eyes.

"Ygritte" he whispered softly as she slid to his side. Her body curled into his, her breasts pressed against his side. It was not often that she did not redress after, especially in the night when the cold was at its worst, so he reveled in the moment. Her blue eyes turned themselves up to him, waiting for him to speak "I love you" he offered, his voice slightly shaky. For a moment she said nothing and he feared she wouldn't, even a rejection was better than silence. Her eyes seemed to be contemplating something, an answer he hoped, a response.

"Aye, and I you" she remarked, running one hand down his chest. Her fingers danced across him gently, tracing the lines of his chest, his stomach and working their way back up to his mouth "very much, I do" she remarked, her voice low, so low he had to strain to hear her but he had. A smile worked its way across his lips as he leaned in and kissed her forehead.

"We could go back to that cave, you know" he remarked, a devilish grin on his face. Her own face lit up, red hair falling across it ever so slightly.

"Aye, and might be we stay there this time… would you like that, Jon Snow?" she asked, turning her head to him, but before he could answer she asked another question, one that took him by surprise "or would you like to live in one of them windmills we saw?" The words were a shock to him, for though she had asked once, he had never thought her serious, but he wasn't sure he could stay this side of the wall with her, and from the look in her eyes much as she liked the windmills and liked seeing him happy, she didn't much like the idea of being trapped behind four walls of man made rock. The cave was one thing, it was a _part_ of the north, _made_ by the north not by the men who claimed it. He breathed in deeply before letting a smile crawl across his lips.

"I'd rather the cave, if it's all the same to you" he whispered, kissing her lips gently. She smiled against them, a genuine smile, her eyes bright and excited as she crawled back atop him.

"Aye, and you could kiss me proper, the way the lords do down 'ere" she teased, her teeth nibbling gently at his ears. He groaned slightly and smiled wickedly at her.

"Or, I could just remind you how they kiss now"

 **Author's Note: Honestly, I think this is my favorite so far. I love the talk of the cave and such and I hope anyone reading this did too. Feel free to give me feedback and ideas, I'll have another chapter out in the next day or two!**


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